


Wanting

by thewightknight



Series: First Order Husbands [7]
Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015), Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: M/M, angst and yearning, assault with the force, first order husbands, sentient kyber crystals, simulations, snoke is a bastard, where oh where has our little ren gone
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-12
Updated: 2016-02-12
Packaged: 2018-05-19 19:51:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,415
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5979118
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thewightknight/pseuds/thewightknight
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hux and Ren return to the Supreme Leader's base and as Ren completes his training Hux again searches for ways to occupy his time.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Wanting

The outward leg of their journey had taken over a month. Their return trip would take just over three days. It was too fast for Hux, but also not fast enough. 

Ren spent the majority of his waking hours the first day sitting cross legged on their bed with the Kyber crystal that he had found cradled in his hands. Hux couldn’t go into the room with it. He tried, but every time he’d retreat in under a minute, head pounding and stomach roiling. Its miasma filled the whole shuttle and even when Ren put it back in the box, closed the lid and put it away, Hux still couldn’t sleep. 

Towards the end of the second day he couldn’t take it anymore. He dropped them out of hyperspace and landed on the first habitable planet. They’d barely settled when he was on his way out of the shuttle. He only made it a few paces away before dropping to his knees and throwing up, retching and heaving long past the point where he’d voided the contents of his stomach.

Dimly, he was aware of Ren next to him, a hand at the small of his back, a murmur in his ear that resolved into words as his spasms subsided.

"I'm sorry, so I'm sorry. I didn't know it was affecting you like this. I didn't know," Ren kept repeating.

When he regained control, Hux had to ask. "How can you stand it? Holding it, touching it? It's so ...." The word _evil_ danced at the tip of his tongue, but he held it in.

For once, Ren seemed unaware of the turn his thoughts were taking.

"It's amazing, isn't it? Snoke says it has been waiting for me for centuries, waiting for me to be ready."

"He’s communicating with you?" The thought of Snoke watching over them was unnerving, especially considering the staggering amounts of sex they’d been having.

"Only since we landed. He guided me through the caves to where it lay."

So the Supreme Leader hadn't been a silent passenger for the entire length of their journey. Hux let out a silent sigh of relief. It's not that he had anything to worry about, he told himself. Snoke had given them his approval, after all. But he’d like to maintain at least an illusion that he had a small part of Ren all to himself. 

"And since we began our journey back, he's been helping commune with it, bond to it. When we're finished I alone will be able to wield it."

Affection for the enthusiasm with which Ren spoke warred with worry. 

"It doesn't feel ..." Hux paused, searching again for the right word. "... strange to you?"

Ren got a faraway look in his eyes. "It feels ... happy. Happy that I found it, that I will be the one to mold it, to craft it a home. It’s waited so long." His voice trailed off, and Hux's stomach lurched again.

They spent the night planetside at Ren’s insistence. Ren brought out a fusion lantern when the temperature began to drop, but hooded it so they could benefit from the heat it put out without disturbing their view of the night sky. Leaning back against Ren, enfolded in his arms, Hux drifted off, the first sleep he’d gotten since they’d begun their return trip.

Ren must have moved them at some point during the evening but Hux had no memory of it because he woke in their bed in the shuttle, buried in blankets with Ren wrapped around him. He tensed, but the atmosphere in the shuttle was almost as it had been for their outward journey. There was a lingering sense of something, a hint of a taste at the back of his throat, a slight pressure at his temples, but as soon as he started trying to identify it, it disappeared. 

He shifted in bed, unsettled still by the influence the crystal seemed to have over both of them, chasing nebulous worries around in his head. When they returned he was sure Ren would disappear again, for who knows how long this time as he built his new lightsaber. And then according to Snoke his training would be complete. What would happen to the two of them afterwards? Hux had no idea. Would they return to the _Finalizer_ and continue the fight against the Resistance? Would they even be allowed to remain together? Snoke had told him he was included in his plans for Ren, but not knowing what those plans were he had no inkling of how to predict his place in them. 

And what of his own plans, he thought? He had dreamed of power his whole life, and yet these last these few months those dreams had been forgotten, his entire being had become focused on the man in whose arms he now lay. This ridiculous man who was now drooling on his back, Hux realized. He shifted, turning to face Ren, who responded by burrowing in closer, arm tightening around him. Ren was taller than him by several inches and broader through the shoulders too, but he still managed to tuck himself under Hux’s chin.

“Ridiculous man.” Hux realized he’d spoken the words aloud this time when Ren murmured something unintelligible in response.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

They were greeted as they’d left, with a full complement of Stormtroopers awaiting them in the docking bay. Ren was bouncing on his toes in excitement and as soon as the ramp dropped he raced off the shuttle, the box with his crystal clasped to his chest, paying no mind to the troopers that saluted him as he passed. Hux sighed and made his way down at a more sedate pace, acknowledging the troopers with nods. His lieutenant fell in beside him and began bringing him up to speed as they walked. As he'd expected, everything had run perfectly in his absence. 

The mine's efficiency was going to be a problem, as he hadn't yet figured out how to move the ores offworld without compromising the secrecy of the Supreme Leader's location. He spent his first day back running numbers and at the end of it he reluctantly ordered the troopers to ramp down production after he figured out just how quickly they would run out of storage space at their current efficiencies. 

He would have been able to come up with a solution, he was sure, if he could get some sleep. He hadn't realized how accustomed he'd become to Ren's presence until he crawled into his empty bed each night. There had been no sign of him, just as he'd expected and feared. There was no word from Snoke either, no summons, not one word even of thanks for completing the mission Snoke had entrusted him with. It only took a few days for him to start to feel useless again and that didn't help with the sleeping either. 

A week passed, and then another. With nothing else to do Hux began running his troopers through flight simulation missions and he finally found a flaw in the men and women under his command. Everything they did was textbook perfect so when he started throwing some of the unconventional moves he'd witnessed from Resistance pilots at them (specifically the moves from one particular pilot they should have killed when they had the chance) they began dying in his simulated runs at an alarming rate. The troopers were even more concerned about this than he was and for the next week they ran themselves and him ragged.

To his bemusement Hux found himself enjoying his role as “resistance scum.” Wracking his brain for maneuvers while programming the simulators and leading practice run after practice took an incredible amount of concentration and left him little free brain matter to brood as the third week after their return drew to a close, and it had the added benefit of tiring him out enough that he was managing to sleep for three or four hours at a time.

Towards the end of this third week, late one afternoon he led a squad on a merry chase round a simulation of a Star Destroyer, their fourth run that day. He’d taken out five of the ten pilots chasing him, three by his own hand and two with his programmed squadmates, and had only lost two of his, when a new blip appeared on his scanners. Frowning, he tapped the screen with a finger, wondering if he had a ghost in the program, but no, it was another ship joining the simulation.

“Pilot, identify yourself,” he ordered. Only static came through over the comms but a familiar touch grazed his lips.

“Ren?” he asked, but there was no response. “Infuriating man,” he muttered, and a chuckle whispered through the simulator pod. 

In just these few moments of distraction Ren had gained on him and without warning two of the rebel simulations disappeared from his scanner. Hux swore as an alarm sounded, warning him of a targeting lock. He yanked back on his stick, took his sim into a steep climb, then jogged through a series of banks and turns until the alarm stopped. While he’d been distracted the TIE pilots had taken advantage and ganged up on his rebel ships. Two more were taken down as Ren continued to pursue him.

There was a sensation in the cockpit now, a feeling, like someone was watching just over his shoulder. It tickled at the edges of his consciousness. He refused to allow it to distract him, though. His fighters were being menaced by the TIE pilots now that he didn't have the attention to spare to protect them and another blip disappeared as he played hide and seek with Ren along the star destroyer's topography. He heard, or more accurately felt Ren chuckle, and then the targeting alarm sounded again. This time, no matter how he swerved and dodged Ren’s shots came closer and closer and the sensation of not being alone in his head increased.

"You cheating bastard," Hux swore as the sim registered a glancing shot on his wing. "Get into my brain, will you? Well, picture this." And with that he flung up the memory of how Ren had looked there in the corridor of the shuttle with his cock in Hux’s mouth. It seemed to distract Ren, as the pressure in his head lessened and he took advantage, pouring on the speed as he shot straight up, looping around and coming down behind the TIE fighters. He hit one and when it spun out of control it took two more with it. One of his rebel ships got clipped as well, and before it had a chance to recover Ren descended on it. 

Hux had three left in his squad now versus two troopers and Ren. He typed in the commands that sent two of his remaining ships shooting off to the target while the other two shadowed him as he swung around again. These two didn’t last long, but they took out one of the remaining TIEs before going down. It was now three against three. He took his simulator through a dizzying series of acrobatics and managed to get one of the pilots to take out the other by accident. A string of profanity came through the comms as the last remaining pilot realized what he’d done, quite non-regulation there, and then another as he locked on. 

With the last of his adversaries gone, he turned his attention back to Ren, who had abandoned him in favor of the two remaining Resistance sims. As Hux sped towards him he watched Ren take them both out with two well-placed shots. It gave Hux just the opportunity he needed, though, as Ren was locked into his sights. He fired, then let loose with a string of curses himself as Ren’s ship dropped straight down and his shots ripped into the hull of the destroyer instead. He lost sight of Ren completely as his virtual display was filled with pyrotechnics and expected to hear the targeting alarm start blaring at any second, but it remained silent and Ren’s ship wasn’t showing on his scanner anymore.

"What are you doing now?" he muttered, and there was a caress on his cheek again. Well, screw him, there was still a mission objective. Let’s see if he could make it, he decided. He accelerated, diving down into one of the service trenches, splitting his attention between the simulation and a slew of carnal images in case Ren decided to pry around in his thoughts again. 

He was almost in range of the target, an exhaust port that would feed his shots directly to the hypermatter reactor, when Ren dropped down almost on top of him. The shrieks of the alarm system caused him to jump and the sim computers let him know he’d scraped against the sides of the trench. It was only this reaction that saved him, the unplanned maneuver spinning him away from Ren’s shot. He laid down a barrage of fire, trying to keep Ren off his tail for just a few more minutes, but Ren’s next series of shots went through his left wings. His chair lurched and more alarms sounded, warning him his engines were critical. 

Gritting his teeth, he poured everything into one last-ditch effort. Ren’s next shot ripped through the cabin, turning his ship into a virtual fireball. At his speed and as close as he was, he had enough momentum still that as the sim flickered out around him he saw that he’d managed to crash the remains of his ship into the port, thus ensuring the destruction of his target. He wasn’t a fan of suicide runs, considering them the absolute last resort of piss-poor planning, but since had it earned him his victory this time he’d allow it. 

Hux wanted nothing more than to leap from his pod as soon as the simulation ended but he forced himself go through the normal shut down procedures, logging his flight before disconnecting. He made a note to recommend overlapping shields and redundant systems for future star destroyer development. The engines required these exhaust ports but they were a weakness that had been exploited too often. 

The troopers were waiting for him when he exited. Ren, however, was nowhere in sight. He tried not to be obvious about looking around, but they noticed anyways. One of them stepped forward.

“Um, it appears Lord Ren was never here, sir. The sim came to life all on its own.” Awe was evident in her voice even through the helmet mike.

Hux swallowed his disappointment, schooled his face. “Very good. I expect an analysis of this exercise from each of you at start of shift tomorrow.”

The troopers all snapped to attention and a chorus of “Yes sir!” rang out.

“Very well. Dismissed.” Hux made himself do as he would normally, downloaded the simulator logs onto his datapad, kept his pace casual as he left the bay. He pretended to be absorbed in the data, pretended that his course through the base was random and that it was just an accident that he ended up in front of his quarters. He was sure that Ren would be waiting for him, was half hard again in anticipation as he entered, and all the euphoria drained out of him when he found his rooms empty. Tonight, he told himself. Surely Ren would appear this evening, slide into his bed as he slept, curl round him again, hold him close, breath in his ear while his arm circled Hux’s waist. Tonight.

He exited his quarters and was just a few steps from the door when the floor shifted under his feet. He staggered, catching himself against the wall as another shockwave ripped through the hallway and had just enough time to wonder if this was coming through whatever bond he seemed to have with Ren when a third tremor hit. This time the lights flickered and alarms began sounding throughout the base. Abandoning all dignity, Hux ran to the nearest comm panel.

“Report!” he demanded.

“We are not under attack, sir. The tremors are localized to the base and the mines, but we cannot determine an origin point. The base’s containment is secure, sir.” Another blast ripped through the base just as the trooper finished speaking. 

It was Ren, Hux was sure, even though he hadn’t felt anything besides the physical manifestations this time. With no compulsion to direct him he still made his way to Snoke’s chamber. The door remained closed when he approached.

“Supreme Leader?” he called out, receiving no response. He tried again. “Supreme Leader, we are experiencing …” This time, he was cut off.

 _ **You were not summoned, Hux.**_ Snoke’s mental voice cut through his skull.

Undeterred, Hux pressed on. “Supreme Leader, there is a disturbance affecting the base.”

 _ **It is not your concern.**_ Snoke’s thoughts battered at him and his head began to throb. 

He tried one more time. “I believe Lord Ren …” He thought he was prepared for a mental assault, but was still taken by surprise when he flew backwards. His head connected with the cold metal with a crack, and he was crushed against the wall, pinned in place while Snoke’s mental voice bombarded him.

_**You presume too much, Hux. Lord Ren is not your concern now. Do not make me regret my previous leniency with you.** _

The pressure holding him in place disappeared and Hux fell to his knees. That was going to bruise, he thought as he tried not to cough, air rushing back into his lungs again as the pressure against his chest abated.

_**You are dismissed.** _

Hux pushed himself to his feet, dizzy, head throbbing. “Yes, Supreme Leader. My apologies.”

Probing at the back of his skull as he made his way to the command center, he winced. His scalp was tender and some swelling had begun but his vision was clear and the churning of his stomach was more due to Snoke’s curt dismissal than the head injury.

The mood in the command center was tense when he arrived but the alarms had ceased and there was no sense of panic or urgency in the room.

“General Hux, whatever was causing the tremors seems to have stopped. There is some minor damage to a few systems, but repairs are already underway. We should be back to optimum condition within the next hour, sir.”

“Very well. I will be in my office. Notify me of any changes.” 

A dose of numb spray helped ease the throbbing in his head and an antistress capsule took most of the tremble out of his hands. Something had gone wrong. It seemed both he and Ren had earned Snoke’s displeasure, and he had no idea why.

The remainder of the afternoon passed with excruciating slowness. Repair reports arrived within the promised hour, and eight out of ten of his simulator squad had already submitted their analysis of the day’s exercise before the dinner bell rang. He examined them perfunctorily, not remembering what he’d read within moments after reviewing each file.

Hux skipped dinner, his stomach still in knots. He briefly considered hacking into the programming for the replicator in his quarters but decided in the end that a drink was the last thing he needed that evening.

He made himself sit, called up a book on his datapad. He even managed to make himself concentrate on the words for a chapter or two. After an hour or so he realized he’d been staring at the same page for who knows how long but he couldn’t bring himself to do anything else. Part of him wanted to crawl into bed right now, no matter the early hour, as if it would force Ren to come to him sooner. Another part didn’t want to go anywhere near the bed at all, wanted to continue sitting, waiting, to be awake when Ren came through his door. He never questioned the certainty that he would see Ren that night.

So when his alarm sounded he woke, bewildered, still in his chair, still alone in his rooms, neck and back aching from the awkward position in which he’d spent the night. He rose with a groan, body and heart aching. Setting the temperature in the shower as hot as he could stand, he stood under the stream, head resting against the shower wall until the water ran cold.

**Author's Note:**

> This section got longer than I expected, but isn't that always the case? I think I'll wrap this up in one more section. I actually expected to finish up this story arc here, but as usual things got away from me. I've still got other stories planned for these two, though. ~~I don't know whether I should keep posting them here in this series or break off and make them separate works. What do you think?~~ So I'll be wrapping this up as a series, but there'll be more stories with these two for certain. Whether it's in the same storyline or not, though, I don't know for sure.
> 
> Oh, and by the way, here's some gifs of [sad Hux in the shower ](http://thewightknight.tumblr.com/post/138876800036/how-do-you-feel-about-her)for you.
> 
> Feel free to come say hi over on [tumblr](http://thewightknight.tumblr.com/).


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